He Walked Her Through

Watching someone dear to me walk through the valley of the shadow of death just became very real to me.  That someone was my mom.

We had just chatted on the phone for about 20 minutes and said good night around 11:00.  My husband and I awoke abruptly to the shrill sound of a ringing phone at 3:13AM.  It was my dad and he had just found my mom unresponsive.  He administered CPR while on the phone with 911, the paramedics came and she had no pulse… they were heading to the hospital…  We frantically drove to the ER and had to wait many, long minutes before we could go to her.

When they called us back, they had intubated her, said she had suffered cardiac arrest, and they were prepping her for the cath lab (a room with diagnostic equipment where they can examine the heart).  While sitting with our family in the waiting room, we suddenly heard a “code blue in cath lab room 1”.  It was somewhere around 5:00AM and there was only one room in operation.  We knew it was my mom.

The moments that followed are indescribable and I will not even try to explain the feelings and emotions that washed over that little room.  When someone finally came to give us an update several minutes later, we were told that she had suffered another cardiac arrest and had to be shocked three times to get her heart beating again.  They had placed three stents, and she was being moved to the ICU for recovery.

As the cardiologist left the room, I whispered to my husband, “she just walked through the valley of the shadow of death, didn’t she”?  He said, “yes, and the Lord was her shepherd”. 

The days that laid ahead were trying, long, and tiresome.  She was placed in a state of hypothermia for 24 hours to help slow her bodily functions down to allow her brain time to heal, then slowly warmed for 16 hours before they could take her off the sedation and paralytic medications.  There were many questions and concerns for what might happen when and if she awoke.

While I felt the need to share a handful of details of my mom’s story to this point to give some understanding to this post, I really felt the need to write about the goodness of God.  The doctors came in while she was sedated in the ICU and did an echo-cardiogram of mom’s heart.  There was no damage to the heart and we were told this was a miracle!  This was evidence of the first of many miracles. 

My mom did wake.  A miracle!  She knew each of us standing around her bed.  Yes, a miracle!  She could move her toes on both of her feet and squeeze our hands with both of hers.  Another miracle.  As time progressed, she was able to smile, speak, and recount a long, wonderful history including important dates and details.  Yet, another miracle.  From there she could sip water and broth, then sit on the edge of her bed, then slowly walk to a chair.  More miracles.  Each day she grew stronger and stronger and one week later to the date, she left the hospital to go home with dad where she belongs.  Another miracle.

God saw fit to allow us to share more time together on this earth and He restored her health.  For this my heart overflows with thankfulness.  But, He did more than just allow us time together.  The Great Shepherd walked my mom through the valley of the shadow of death, then walked her through miracle after miracle. 

Psalms 100:3 – Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

Psalms 52:9 – I will praise thee for ever, because thou hast done it…

Many lessons were learned during this journey I witnessed and one day I hope to write about them.  I also have so much to say about my mom, who is indeed a miracle, and maybe one day those words will find their way into a writing.

For now I will say with David in one of my favorite Psalms:

This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalms 118:24

 

 

No Fear

fear (noun)   1. an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

This picture represents an effort to help the Princess Jelly (in the middle of her two boys, of course) overcome her fear of thunder.  At the clap of thunder, she would jump up and shake and cling to the nearest adult.

With the first thunderstorm the spring after her 2nd birthday, the boys and I became super excited and wanted to hear every “boom”.  Our boys had been down the road of fearing thunder, but quickly learned that their parents love thunder and they soon shared the same amazement.  So, as an attempt to enjoy the thunder without Jelly shaking with worry, I told the kids we would watch the rain show.  The boys pulled out their little chairs and I quickly ran into the house and popped some popcorn.

Making the storm exciting, fun, and a good form of entertainment, happened to be just the thing to ease her concern.  She sat there less frightened, still edgy, but was able to enjoy all of her popcorn.  We haven’t had the privilege of hearing thunder yet this spring, but as of last year, she wasn’t too uneasy when it rolled around.

Fear is a real struggle for adults too.  There are the maybe less concerning fears like:  the fear of spiders, snakes, mice, water, ice, fire, wrinkles, flying, driving, etc.  However, there is a large list of greater angst:  the fear of losing a loved one, a car accident, something bad happening, financial struggles, commitment, relationships, or fear of growing old, getting sick, getting hurt, or perhaps the biggest fear of all…the fear of dying.

I think it’s fascinating how easily children trust.  We held her through her times of fear.  We prayed with her and did our best to calm her, and she was usually okay with that.  She saw how we enjoy storms and learned that she was going to be okay, even if the cracking thunder was explosive in her ears.

What do you do with your fear?  Do you become anxious?  Angry?  Sick?  Depressed?  Or, are you able to deal with the fear and overcome it?  I think that some level of fear will exist as long as we have breath.  But, God does not give us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)  He does not want us to be fearful.  He wants to hold us and calm us and tell us the storm is going to be okay.  He wants our trust.

trust (noun) firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.

I thought it was interesting to use TRUST as a noun.  It can also be a verb, an action we practice.  But, as a noun, it becomes “a belief”.  I want my belief (trust) to be God.  I want to rely on Him, His ability, and His strength.

There have been times in my life when fear is very real.  It grips me and ties my stomach in knots.  I can truly say, God has never left me afraid.  Sometimes it might take a while til the darkness flees, but what is darkness?  The absence of light.  When the Light (God) is present, the darkness cannot stay around.

Here is a list of just some scriptures I have found to help me.  You can read them and make them your prayer.

• Psalms 56:3 What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
• Isaiah 41:10 – Fear thou not; for I [am] with thee: be not dismayed; for I [am] thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
• Psalms 34:4 – I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.
• Joshua 1:9 – Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God [is] with thee whithersoever thou goest.
• 2 Samuel 22:3 -The God of my rock; in him will I trust: he is my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my high tower, and my refuge, my saviour; thou savest me from violence.
• Psalms 9:10 And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.
• Psalms 34:8 O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.
• Psalms 56:11 In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do unto me.
• Psalms 91:2 I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.
• Psalms 118:8 It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
• Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
• Proverbs 29:25 The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.
• Proverbs 30:5 Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
• Jeremiah 17:7 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is.

Make it your choice today to put your trust in God.  There is no thing or person more stable or constant in this ever-changing world.

this is the day the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it                  (Psalms 118:24)